Pokémon Nicknames: Ducklett and Swanna

Ducklett (in Japanese: コアルヒー ” Koaruhie”) is a Water and Flying dual type Pokémon. It was introduced in the Unova Region (Pokémon Black and White, or Generation V) in 2011. It evolves into  Swanna (in Japanese: スワンナ “Swanna” ) at level 35 where it remains a Water/Flying dual-type. Reference: Bulbapedia.

I envision that these two Unova waterfowl would like the lake environments of northeastern North America, the Unova Region being New York. I like to give male Ducklett names like “St. Lawrence” or “Hudson Bay”.  Any of the names of the Great Lakes would be a good name.  “Ontario” is my favorite male Ducklett name.  I also like Canadian references, “Toronto” for example.

I’m am not sure if I could ever get down from this duck! 

Ha! Other duck jokes are linked here. “Quebec” or “Quebec Quack” are good sounding duck names. (I can almost hear in my mind’s ear those quacking sounds. Make that — French quacking sounds.) These names are based on “Quebecois” or Québécois — the name for French Canadian nationalists who want Quebec Province to gain independence from Canada. “Le Duc” or “Frenchie” may be interesting names. “Niagara” is named after the famous waterfalls American newlyweds go to. “Adirondack” after the mountain and lake region in upstate New York which is a great source of drinking water for NY.

A Pokémon duck could be named “Duck-Duck-Go“, after the search engine. Users are moving to Duck-Duck-Go because they are tired of Google’s censoring of ideas, and the burying of articles which are counter to Google’s corporate narrative. Just ask James Damore .

You may think of your own “lake” names for these waterfowl.  Famous lake names like “Titicaca” are amusing. I wanted to name one after the “Lady of the Lake” from the King Author legend, but there are not enough spaces.

Everyone know the tale of the “Ugly Duckling” who grew up to be a beautiful swan. So that means the duck in the story was really not a duck. A young Swan somehow got mixed in with duck eggs? Or maybe a mother Swan on somebody’s farm died, and a farmer put the Swan egg in with a mother Duck’s eggs. The poor bird, thought it was abnormal, grew up a troubled youth, when in fact it was actually superior to the other fowl. Lesson learned. Some people do better as adults.

I can see how there is a 50-50 ratio of Male-Female Ducklett, but I think that Swanna looks female by default. I prefer a female Swanna, as it has those two blue breast plates. They look like bra cups … which would not look right on male waterfowl. I like a Swanna to have a high Special Attack stat, and teach it moves like Air Cutter, Scald or   Ice Beam. The animation kinda looks like the beam is coming out of the breast plates. This reminds me that maybe a male could shoot out a beam, if he were using special “Power Pasties”.  What are power pasties you ask? Well obviously you are not familiar with the famous scene from the cult film “Flesh Gordon”. Oh, the seventies … and I digress.

“Swanee” could be a name after the song “Way Down Upon The Swanee River” which was often sung in minstrel shows. You have to take that in a historical context. The actual name of the real river is spelled “Suwanee” after the American Indians who lived there.

Of course, “Swan Lake” is a great name, after the famous Tchaikovsky ballet.

You might think of “Black Swan” after the movie.

The shiny version of Swanna is purple, not black however.

You may also want to consider other “duck” names I have used for waterfowl Pokémon. Please see my links here for Psyduck and Farfetch’d.

What is the name for your lucky-duck-turns-into-swan transformation? Please comment!

Pokémon Nicknames: Stufful and Bewear

Today on “Pokémon Nicknames”, I consider Stufful and Bewear. (Denny knocks Sapporo beer can over, but picks it up quickly with little spillage): Oops … sorry … I’m a klutz, and sometimes have a hard time holding onto items. No I’m not drunk … Oh .. right (Denny in stilted falsetto): Alola … er …ALOLA COUSINS! Today I will suggest nicknames for two cute, cuddly – but DANGEROUS Pokémon.

Be warned … or “Be Ware” – ha ha, because I have a mind … that wanders …

On the Bulbapedia web site it says that Stufful (in Japanese: ヌイコグマ  “Nuikoguma”) is a Normal + Fighting dual-type Pokémon. Stufful is the “Flailing Pokémon” supposedly because it would flail around its cute stuffed-animal-like arms. Many Pokémon fans like to buy plush dolls of their favorite Pokémon. Maybe it is time for a Pokémon that is already a stuffed animal!

Stufful even has a tag!

A cute name might be “Socks” or “Sock Buddy” … (hic)

Stufful evolves into Bewear (in Japanese: キテルグマ  “Kiteruguma”) at level 27, where it remains a Normal + Fighting dual-type. Beware is the “Strong Arm” Pokémon. Bulbapedia says: “While Bewear may appear friendly, it is actually a very dangerous Pokémon. It must never be approached carelessly, even if it is merely swinging its arms around in a friendly fashion. It shows affection with a fond embrace, but its hugs have incredible force.” The story goes that many trainers have been severely injured, and some were even killed by Beware’s loving hugs.

(credit goes to the unknown artist)

Stufful is the perfect Pokémon for those of us who love Japanese Popular Culture! Its ears even look like those “headband ears” which are so popular with cosplayers, maid café goers, Japanese schoolgirls and/or the otaku of the Akihabara district of Tokyo.  Cat (neko) ears are probably the most common headband ears, but mouse, fox, bear or other fuzzy animal ears are also common.

Her cosplay ears are the biggest giveaway that she would love to meet and date a fellow nerd like you!

You should use Tokyo Pop Culture type names for the Pokémon. Names like “Akihabara”, “Shibuya”, or “Harajuku” would be appropriate. I also named one of these bears “Otaku”. “Yuri” or “Yoai” would also be fun, if you enjoy those genres of anime and/or manga.

 

Stufful is a plush doll, so maybe you could use “Doll Parts” after the song by the 1990s alt-rock band Hole (linked here). Cutesy names like “I Wuv You” , “Cuddles” or “Fuzzy Wuzzy” should also work when you bear evolves. “Huggie Bear” is based on the archtypical and quintesential “pimp” character from the 1970s TV police series “Starsky and Hutch“.

A good name would be “Gyu” or “Gyu Gyu Gyu” which is loosely translated as “hugs” or “squeezes”. It is one of those Japanese words which do not translate directly into English. When you give someone a hug there is that wonderful moment, when the hug “becomes a hug” and the mutual feeling of love is exchanged — Gyu!

Another Japnese pop culture name might be “Moe” which loosely describes affectionate aspects of otaku culture.

A good name for a fighting-type I have used is “Hold-My-Beer“. Speaking of …

The Pokémon pink color is off course very “kawaii” but the bright pink is juxtaposed with dark brown portions of its body.  This combination put me off at first, but I understand it is popular, and I have learned to love it.

This color juxtaposition led me to name one of my party Pokémon “PinkAndStink”.

(Denny turns to drinking buddies): You know guys, “the pink” is about the most wonderful thing that there is in this existence. It also is located in very close proximity to “the stink”.  (Gulps) They are both delightful in their own ways … (Sapporo can drops again, but is quickly put upright) … they both have their own unique charms. You may have directed yourself to the pink. You probably spend most of your time there, and the points north, but don’t tell me you have not also explored the stink. There is also that wonderful, sensitive border area, right in between the pink and the stink. You can tell a lot about a lady by how well she manages that marchland … You don’t have to be a conquering hero, but it is a great way to bond with her. You might even end up surprising yourself.

Oh … right … Pokémon names … (Denny raises hand, orders another Sapporo).

A Pokémon with Fluffy takes half damage from moves that make contact. It also takes double damage from Fire-type moves. Fire-type moves that make contact will deal regular damage. (Bulbapedia)

What is the name for your stuffed bear? Please comment!

“I wuv the pink and the stink!”

Pokémon Nicknames: ALOLA forms of Vulpix and Ninetales

ALOLA COUSIN!

I need to update my original “Pokémon Nicknames” post  for Vulpix and Ninetales, as there is now a special Alola form of Vulpix and Ninetales. My original Vulpix/Ninetales post is linked here.

Pokémon Nicknames: Vulpix and Ninetales

The Alola form of Vulpix is an ICE-type. It evolves into Ninetales by using the ice stone.

Credit goes to the original artist.

The Alola form of Vulpix/Ninetales is only caught in Pokémon Sun, but these two Pokémon are readily available through trading on the GTS or with a friend. (Pokémon Moon has Alola ice-type Sandshrew and Sandslash, which also evolves with an ice stone.  It would be jolly good form for you to trade your extra ice-Sandshrew for an ice-Vulpix, or vice versa).

Now that Vulpix is ICE rather than FIRE, I need to suggest nicknames other than names for fire-hot redheads like “Lucy”. I am thinking that instead of a redhead, Vulpix is now a platinum blonde.

I might suggest naming female Vulpix “Gwen” or “Stacy” after Gwen Stacy the tragic girlfriend of Peter Parker in the Spiderman comic books.

I might name one Gwen after singer Gwen Steffani (another platinum blonde), but I have not listened to her music since the 1990s. Other famous, sexy, platinum blonde names could also be used. For example: “Harlow” after legendary actress Jean Harlow.

You may name one “Marilyn” after Marylin Monroe, probably the quintessential platinum blond bombshell. Um … wait … did I say SEXY platinum blondes?  Huh huh … er … yes, well Vulpix and Ninetales females are very beautiful.

She may be a “bottle blonde” but she is also a “beautiful bombshell”! I can’t wait to hear her Nine Tales!

If you want sexy, just don’t name one after Madonna. Why not name your ice-blond “Blondie” after the comic strip, or the early new wave band from New York?

Male Vulpix …. hmmmm … maybe something like “Warhol” after crazy-white-hair-artist Andy Warhol.

Crazy fucking mental-case. See, I am good at NAMING!

I think “Ice Nine” would be a good name for male Ninetales. The term is from the famous Kurt Vonnegut novel “Cat’s Cradle”. The “ice-9” form of water caused the end of the world, but you can read all about it when you go to college. Try  “Snow Job” which is slang for lying, especially if the ice-fairy fox knows moves like “Blizzard”. .  “Shaved Ice” might work, but only because my mind wandered. How about a Spanish name like “Helados“  or “Terra Fría“?

I will end with some nice Vulpix cosplay. Thank you to Tumblr user Vykril Cosplay for her Vulpix kimono cosplay. It looks beautiful!

What is the name for your icy fairy fox? Please comment!

Pokémon Nicknames: Natu and Xatu

Natu ( in Japanese: ネイティ  “Naty” ) is a dual-type Pyschic and Flying Pokémon. It is known as the “Tiny Bird Pokémon”.

Is the bird really the word?

Natu evolves into Xatu (in Japanese: ネイティオ  “Natio” ) at level 25, where it remains a Psychic/Flying type. (There is no Mega-Evolution.) Xatu is known as the “Mystic Pokemon”.  Thus I like to teach it Psychic, Ghost, Dark or Fairy special-attack type moves.

Both Natu and Xatu are stylized with colors and graphics similar to American Indian iconography and themes. In fact, Xatu looks somewhat like a teeppee (tipi) tent, or wigwam.

Natu is a cute little bird so it deserves a cute name. “Teepee” or “Tipi” might be good to go along with the theme. Maybe “Psy-Chick” for females?

I called one Natu “Nanu Nanu” after the catch phrase of the 1970s TV character “Mork”, played by the late actor Robin Williams.

“Nanu Nanu” was a Williams ad-lib, but it became to be known as a goofy but mystical way of saying either “hello” or “goodbye” every episode. (Some fans have equated the phrase with Star Trek’s Mr. Spock saying “Live Long and Prosper” as a mystical hello/goodbye greeting.)

Another name I like to use for little bird Pokémon is “Little Wing”. This name does sound a little like a Native American name … I use it because of the classic Jimi Hendrix song “Little Wing”.  

“When I’m sad, she comes to me …  

          With a thousand smiles, she gives to me free …”

The song (lyrics linked here) has been covered by all reputable blues bands, but you will not find the Hendrix original version on YouTube (cough …R.M.I.).

Other Indian-themed names are “Wigwam“, “Wompum“, or “Peyote“.  Of course you can have a mystical experience with peyote. I discourage using “squaw” as part of the name (“Psycho Squaw“) for example, because the word is sometimes used as a slur. Of course, these days using ANY Native-American word might be trouble … or taken the wrong way … if you ever  have to deal with the mentally-deficient  politically correct ninnies who dominate college campuses.

Xatu can learn the TM “Fly”.  My name “Flying Luck” is based on the phrase “I don’t GIVE a flying luck!”  I have also used names like “Flying Jung” a play on the “Dying Young” film and the famous psychologist Carl Jung. Since Xatu is a “Mystic Pokémon” why not name one “Mystic Pizza” after that famous Julia Roberts movie?

I like to think that these Pokémon cosplayers would like to learn some mystic moves with me.

I like to name them “Arizona” because the coloration is like the classic “SouthWest” type I suppose. I also use the name “Anasazi” after the southwestern American native civilization which mysteriously disappeared.

On that note, you could name the little bird “Pueblo” ,”Adobe” or “Stucco“.

On the Name Rater’s site (he is angry because of YOU) I saw a couple of interesting nicknames. “The Word” (because the bird is the word!) for Natu. Also for Xatu, the names “Tomahawk” — another Indian/bird reference,  and “Psyclone” which is an appropriate air name because Xatu is a flying type. Thanks for the ideas NR, I might name one “Tommy Hawk“.

I named a Xatu which was evaluated with “outstanding potential” the term “Dreamtime“. Actually, the dreamtime is more of an Australian Aborigine phrase for the mystical experiences and visions one may have. The term also correlates with the mystical religious experiences one may have in a sweat lodge.

During my dream-time I want to see a beautiful vision like her!

Ha! “Xatu the Future” (episode linked here).

What is the name for your mystic little bird? Please comment!

References:

http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.serebii.net/

All images are just snagged from the Inter-Webs public domain. All credit for the art goes to the original starving artists. The models (ahem …) can come and see me to work out a payment.

Pokémon Nicknames: Scyther and Scizor

She is BEAUTIFUL … but I might not be thinking with my mantis head …

Scyther (in Japanese: ストライク  “Strike”) is a BUG & FLYING dual-type Pokémon. (Some players are frustrated however, that this flying bug cannot actually learn the TM Fly!) Scyther is known as the “Mantis Pokémon“. It only evolves into Scizor (in Japanese: ハッサム “Hassam”) when traded holding the Metal Coat item. (You might want to get it traded back, so only trade it with another trusted trainer. Scizor becomes a BUG & STEEL type and is known as the “Pincer Pokémon”. Scizor can Mega Evolve into Mega Scizor if holding a Scizorite stone.

Scizor can Mega Evolve into Mega Scizor if holding a Scizorite stone.

My favorite nickname for Scyther is “Slingblade” named after the classic Billy-Bob Thornton film “Slingblade”. (By far, his best movie.)

This is most appropriate — as you can see in the intense scene below.

“Some folks call it a Scyther-blade … I call it a sling-blade …”

My second favorite name for Scyther or Scizor is “Ronin” or some variation of a Samurai-related term. “BoshidoBug” for example.

Scyther — in the game — does not  look very female, so naming the fairer-gender may be harder. These cosplayers make Scyther look more like a beautiful fairy than an ugly bug however.

I usually name female Scyther something like “A.Castrator ” or “La Castra”, because …

Ahem … this flying fairy bug could easily castrate an opposing male Pokémon.

(Denny in high pitched voice): – maybe you could teach it the move “Swords Dance” for extra power!

Scyther is a Mantis. I learned in my Invertebrate Zoology course that the female Mantis is much larger and is a more viscous predator than the male.  Typically she will bite the head off of her chosen male suitors. In fact, the male will mate more effectively once his head has been severed. (Guys, take this Mantis advice:  (cough) … If you are ever having trouble at the crucial point …don’t over-think it … Ah, and it will be … OK, there it is again…).

Another female who cannot figure out why she cannot sustain a meaningful relationship.

Once the female Mantis has received sperm from the typical unthinking male, she will devour the rest of him. In fact, she may continue eating the other stupid males who were also attracted by her pheromones, and were waiting their chance. The males would be better off by not thinking with their little bug dicks, but who can ever learn that lesson?

Names for Scizor: I have used include “Edward” because of the film Edward Scissorhands”. The name “Scissorhands” has 12-letters which just makes the limit.

You could use the name “Run-With-Me” as a joke, because everyone know that you should not run with Scizors … Ha.

What is the name for your castrating bug? Please COMMENT, or “Like” … yada-yada-yada.

REFERENCES: I always get my basic information from Bulbapedia or Serebi dot net. You can also get nickname suggestions from the Name Rater‘s web page link (although HE HATES YOU). Everything else is Googily-dooed on Pixeley-Poo.

DISCLAIMER: All artwork is property of the original artists. Would you like to meet me for a drink to discuss your work?

Pokémon Nicknames: Hoothoot and Noctowl

ShadowBall, use your hooters … er … I mean, Hooters — use ShadowBall!

Hoothoot (in Japanese: ホーホー  “Hoho”) is the “Owl Pokémon”. The little hooter is a dual-type Normal & Flying Pokémon. Hoothoot evolves into Noctowl (in Japanese: ヨルノズク “Yorunozuku”) at level 20, where it remains a Normal/Flying dual-type.

Thus far, there is not a mega-evolved form. Noctowl is a fun Pokémon, but it is not particularly strong. I hope that there will be a mega-evolution someday, where it might be a powerful dual Flying and Psychic type. I like to teach this mysterious bird psychic moves like “Hypnosis” in order to make your opponent sleep.

My favorite name for Noctowl is “Fly-By-Night”. I more often use the music note symbol instead of a dash, because it stands for the RUSH song and album “Fly By Night”. I also like to catch them with a Timer Ball, as the clock graphic seems to fit the name, and the Rush lyrics.

I thought that “Noctowl” sounded like a sleep-aide  or cold medicine, so I named one “Nyquil”. I also named a Hoothoot “Hooterville” after the fictional rural town in the TV series “Green Acres” and “Petticoat Junction”. Even “The Beverly Hillbillies” once went to Hooterville. I named one “Drucker” after Sam Drucker, the grocer at the Hooterville general store.

An obvious owl-related name would be “Hooters” after the famous chicken-wing restaurant. I think I know the reason why that wings restaurant is called “Hooters”. When one eats chicken wings which are a little too spicy, your mouth burns, and you try to fan off your mouth and say “Hooo hot …. “hooo”.

Re-size to fit page.

With all those diners saying “Hooo…” so much, they probably thought that it sounded like owls, and so they might as well just call the place “Hooters”!

Ahem. Other names I might suggest include: “Nox” as a short form of “Equinox” — which might be a cool name too. I think that “Twin Peeks” is good, especially for little Hoothoot. I loved the old TV miniseries “Twin Peaks” created by director David Lynch (the hauntingly beautiful theme song is linked here). Owls were part of the symbolism in this mystery. “Peaks” might mean two glorious mounds of inspiration. but spelled as “Peeks” it refers to the eyes of the owl.

Notice how the viewer is drawn in to that beautiful pair of owl-like peekers.

As seen above, “Who-Are-You” may be a fun name if you like classic rock or that CSI TV show.

I always like that Tootsie Pop commercial with Mr. Owl. I did not find much I liked on the Name Rater site, but I did like these “Dr. Who“, “Nightwing” “and “Athena“.

Owl nicknames may be a topic to explore further! There will be an owl starter Pokémon (named Rowlet) in the new game —  Pokémon Sun and Moon. It releases this November 18th.

What do you name your little hooters? Please comment!

References:

http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.serebii.net/

 

 

Pokémon Nicknames: Koffing and Weezing

Koffing ( in Japanese: ドガース  “Dogars”) is a poison-type Pokémon.

You don’t look addicting at all dear girl. Perhaps there would be no harm in trying it out once or twice.

It evolves into evolves into Weezing (in Japanese: マタドガス  “Matadogas”) when it reaches level 35, where it remains a poison type. Currently, there is not a mega-evolution for Weezing however..

I like to name this Pokémon “LA Smog”. I sometimes just name them “Los Angeles”  after the famously polluted California city. Some players have named a Koffing “New York” and the evolved Weezing “LA” because they are both polluted cities. Los Angeles’ smog is much worse than any east coast city, as southern California in general, and the Los Angeles basin in particular have a unique physical geography which creates temperature inversions which trap air pollution in place.

It may be fun to create a whole Koffing/Weezing team, and name them after world cities which have the worst air pollution. Beijing, Mexico City, etc.

Perhaps “L.A. Woman” after the famous Doors song.

Speaking of California and smog — and weezing: The band called Weezer has this new song called “California Kids.” There is a haze for sure.

“Monoxide” might be a good name – particularly for the single ball Koffing — as carbon monoxide is the greatest air pollutant by weight in our urban areas.

Cigarette smoke contains carbon monoxide, which will damage your brain. When Koffing evolves – change it to “Dioxide.”

Kids, DO NOT SMOKE. Cigarette smoke contains a chemical which will give you brain damage.

I might prefer names like “Ozone” or “Oh-Three”. The worst part of photo-chemical smog is ozone gas ( O₃ or three atoms of oxygen).

“Ball-of-Gasl” or “Gas-Bag” may also be appropriate. Think of TV gasbags like the Keith Olbermann. … or just name it “Olbermann” and assume that the opponent knows that you infer a poisonous gas-bag Pokémon.

Gas Bag Hags on ABC “The View”

Who is your favorite poison gas-bag?

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A playful name for weezing might be “Weezy” or “Louise” after the famous character “Weezy Jefferson” from the great 1970s hit sitcom: “The Jeffersons”.

What would you name your smokey orbs? Please comment!

References and Resources:

http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.serebii.net/

http://pkmn.net/?action=rater

Pokémon Nicknames: Volbeat and Illumise

Volbeat (in Japanese: バルビート  “Barubeat”) is the “Firefly Pokémon”. It is a BUG-type. It does not evolve, and so far there is no Mega-evolutionary form. All Volbeats are male.

You can breed it with a Ditto, to produce an egg that will either hatch as a Volbeat if it is male, or an Illumise if the hatchling is female.

Illumise (in Japanese: イルミーゼ  “Illumise”) is also a Bug-type, known as the “Firefly Pokémon”. It also does not evolve from or into any form.

I wonder if she knows TM 70?

All are female, and can be bred with either a Ditto or a Volbeat. Eggs would contain either Illumise or Volbeat.

I like to name Volbeat after members of the Beatles. I used to use combined names, like John-Paul or George-Ringo, but then I just gave them the individual names of the Beatles. “John”, “Paul”, etc.

I even used “Pete Best” as he was the original Beatles drummer. Did you know that there was another Beatles member — “Stu”? Stuart Sutcliff was one of the original Beatles, and was a big influence on John and Paul until his untimely death.

Paul, John, George, Stu and Pete.

I have also named Volbeat “Down Beat” or “Downbeat” after the Jazz musical style. I also like “Fahrvernugen” – after “Fahrvergnügen” the slogan for Volkswagen automobiles, but I would have to misspell it due to the 12 letter limit. Of course you can just name it “VW” or “V.W. Beetle”. There is also a Danish heavy-metal group called Volbeat, so if you are a Euro-metal fan, you could name Volbeat after one of their songs. “EnglishBeat” and “Bronski Beat” are 1980s new wave music examples.

Another possible name for this Beetle is “The Love Bug” or “Herbie” after the famous Disney movie. The name “Ocho” would be subtle play on Herbie’s racing number.

Herbie’s headlights as seen in the 2005 remake with Lindsay Lohan.

Illumise —  by contrast — is gorgeous. She has these most amazing eyes. This Firefly is a nocturnal beauty. I have used the name “NightLight“. You could name Illumise after any pretty girl with enchanting eyes. “Moon-in-June” or “Moon-Bug” may be OK. “Bedroom Eyes” anyone?

Guess who!

It probably will not surprise you, but I named one “Iwasa Misaki” after the world’s most beautiful woman … er … I mean … um … er … second only to my wife … um … is what I meant to say. I named another one “Wasamin” and used the little heart symbols as part of the name. I leveled little, bright-eyed Wasamin up to Level 100 in a Luxury Ball, and also super-trained her.

What is the name for your favorite firefly? Please comment!

Use TM70 “Flash” ! … really, I won’t mind.

Maybe I should have named this night-lightning bug something like “Headlights” or “Highbeams” – after, well, you know.

References: Bulbapedia and Serebi.net. … and, although he hates you, you may find other example names on the Name-Rater’s website.

Pokémon Nicknames: Grimer and Muk

THE GREAT WAVE OF CRAP-A-GAWA: A shitstorm? More like a shit tsunami!!!

Grimer (in Japanese: ベトベター  “Betbeter”) is a Poison-type Pokémon. Grimer evolves into Muk (in Japanese: ベトベトン  “Betbeton”) at level 38, where it remains a Poison-type. There is currently no way to Mega-evolve Muk.

Both Grimer and Muk are termed the “Sludge Pokémon”. Basically, Grimer is just a pile of crap. Muk is an even bigger, festering pile of excrement.

Q: “What are you going to the Con dressed as?”   A: I think I will show up as a huge, putrid pile of human sewage!

My favorite Grimer/Muk nickname is “The-95-Feces” – which is a play on words about the famous “Ninety-Five Theses”. History tells us that the Protestant reformer Martin Luther nailed his “ninety-five theses” of to the door of the Catholic Church in protest. (Readers: Please know I am NOT making fun of religion here, just having my fun with wordplay.) 

Could you image a trainer nailing 95 Grimers to the door of Team Rocket HQ?

If you are not big on historical references, then you could name them after any type of excrement or pollution. Anything that you think is a “pile of crap”, you can name a Grimer/Muk after it. I named a Muk “Obamacare” , then sent it out on the Wonder-Trade. The user on the other end would have gotten a message “Denny sent over Obamacare … take good care of Obamacare”. Lots of laughs. Really, use a name fer anything you consider to be synonymous with SHIT …

Wondertrade is also a good way to send over “Massive Dump” or “A Huge Load“, perhaps even “My-Epic-Deuce” if you are playful. 

(I have not tried it, but would the name-censor allow the name “S.H.I.T.E.“?) 

Another name I have used is “Blockage” after all that undigested red meat you have in your intestines. Speaking of colon blockages – McDonald’s restaurants at one time had a costumed character called “Grimace”. Coincidence? The Pokémon Grimer looks a lot like the McDonald’s character.

Wouldn’t he actually want people to eat A LOT of McDonald’s food?

Grimace was at first a bad guy like the “Hamburgler”. Grimace would steal your milkshake.  Maybe that is not so bad … McDonalds food (like all fast-food) is full of sugar, fat and empty calories. If you eat too much greasy fast food, you may get a Muk stuck in your bowels.

Perhaps female Grimer could be named “Polly Polyps” after what you do not want found in your colonoscopy.  Speaking of —  do you want to see a scan from my recent colon exam?

How do I do it? … Clean living!

I sometimes give Grimer a “cute” nickname like “Stinky-Poo” or something equally playful and charming, like “Rubberturd“. You know what side-splitting funny? Fake poop.

Someone in China has the job of making “fake poop”. Does the worker ever wonder “Why Americans buy this crap?”

A name like “Prunes” might be good. Prunes are good for maintaining regularity. Also, as noted by almost every middle-schooler in history – prunes already look like a turd!

Perhaps a name like “Ca-Ca Monster” after the muppet — Cookie Monster.

Named for a sound effect: perhaps a name like “Plop Plop” would work for a little Grimer. Perhaps “Floater” might be good for your little Grimer. Names having to do with sludge or sewers could wor. Perhaps “Sewardt” as a deviation of “Stuart”. Perhaps you would laugh when my trainer throws out a Muk named “Fudge-Pack“.

On the Name Rater webpage (linked there) I did not see a lot of Grimer names that i liked. “Grimetime” and “Poo Poo” were OK, I guess. Muk names “Lahar” “Schmuk” or “Mr. Turd” might be the basis of thinking something else. Maybe we should leave with a more positive image.

May I  present: “The Goddess of Regularity.”

What is the name of your piece-of-crap? Please comment!

12/20/2016

ALOLA UPDATE: There are now special Alola forms of Grimer and Muk!

Thus, You may want to experiment with more colorful names. “I-Ate-Corn” for example.

“Mean-Tweet” would be one colorful example of shit. We have all seen or received unappealing messages on Twitter and elsewhere. I almost never use Twitter because it is mostly crap. When I read these hate-filled profane messages from petulant celebrities (Katy Perry, etc.), I feel like I stepped in a Muk.

References:

http://bulbapedia.bulbagarden.net/wiki/Main_Page

http://www.serebii.net/

Pokémon Nicknames: Sunkern and Sunflora

Hey Orville: Is the term “old maid” for the un-popped kernels, maybe just a little misogynist?

Pokémon Nicknames: Sunkern and Sunflora: Sunkern (in Japanese: ヒマナッツ  “Himanuts”) is a Grass-type which evolves into Sunflora only when exposed to a Sun Stone. The level does not matter, but it remains a Grass-type only. (There is no known Mega-Evolution yet.)

The Japanese name “Himanuts” is actually a pretty cute name right there! … especially if you don’t plan to evolve it. Just keeping the “real” name of a Pokémon — but in a different language — may be a fun way to go about naming your Pokémon.The Japanese name for Sunflora is: キマワリ  or “Kimawari”.

From Bulbapedia: Kimawari may be a combination of 黄 ki (yellow) or 吉 ki (joy), and 向日葵 himawari (sunflower). In French — the Pokémon is called Héliatronc, based on Helios. The German name Sonnflora is based on the German word Sonneblume.

Careful that you do not get inhaled, my dear kernel!

I always like to teach Grass-types HP stealing moves like Giga Drain. Seed Bomb is also one of my favorite attacks. I think a good name would be “CornHusker” after the Nebraska Cornhuskers college team. I have named them “Nebraska” as well, and I believe this will still fit even after Sunkern’s evolution into a sunflower, as sunflower fields are common in the Great Plains states. Ahem, there is nothing “corny” about this flower:

They raise them right in Lincoln, son.

Names like “Orville” or “Redenbacher” would be appropriate, especially if you like that brand of popping corn. “VeryPoppins” or some derivation, might be used. You can play around with these variations.

My favorite name for Sunkern is Cornholio — a character from the old “Beavis and ButtHead” cartoon series. Of course,  Beavis WAS Cornholio – a transformation he would make after accidentally eating too much sugar.

Quoted: “Would you like to see my bunghole?”

What? … you have never seen the show? What on Earth are they teaching kids in school these days?.

If you appreciate black humor, name a Sunkern “Bad Seed” after the famous novel and movie. (The difficult to watch clip is linked here.)

Another dark-comedy name would be “RapeSeed” after the original name for Canola, commonly used in vegetable oil. Please do not be put off by the term Rapeseed.

An awkward moment at Mr. Name Raters house.

If I may digress a little here, the term “Canola” was actually invented by the (Denny is not making this up)  “Rapeseed Association of Canada” in the 1970s. The “Can” part stands for Canada and “ola” refers to oil …

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OW!! OW!!! OWW!!! (At the mention of the word “rapeseed” — a large mannish-looking woman ran to Denny’s seat at the coffee shop and knocked him on the head with a copy of the book “Our Bodies – Ourselves”.

“You said RAPE …” the mammoth lady bellowed, then let out a blood curtailing scream “RAAAAAPE” —– then wacked Denny again.  

The perverse giant raged: “If you joke about rape – THAT MEANS YOU ARE A RAPIST!” —  WACK!!! (Hits Denny again with the book.) .. IST .. IST … IST  .. (Ringing in Denny’s ear)

“But .. I … “(Denny protests) … WHACK — the demonic behemoth clobbers Denny again … 

“Your culture is RAPE … RAAAAPE!!!” – the obese marginally-female trucker bellowed, “You showed a photo of a girl” — that’s RAAAAAAAAAPE!

“Wait, that’s not the same as …”  (Denny tries defending himself) … WHAP! — The acid-crotched mutant nostrils flared, then kicked Denny with its hoof.

“ALL MEN ARE RAAAAAAAPISTS !!!!” … the hideous banshee howled, hitting Denny again with the rolled up feminist manifesto, knocking him unconscious.

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(Denny from his PokéCenter hospital bed): … if I may finally explain: The word “rape” in rapeseed comes from the Latin word rapum meaning “turnip”. (Denny holds head, rubbing bandages) … Turnip...  Turnip, rutabagas, cabbage, Brussels sprouts are all genetically related to rapeseed. Rapeseed is a close relative of mustard seed, and is an important crop which is processed for its vegetable oil.

Who would of thought that this little love flower would cause so much trouble? https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Canola_Flower.jpg#/media/File:Canola_Flower.jpg

The name change became necessary as sensitive American buyers balked at the word “Rape”. Thus we have Canola vegetable oil today.

Thank you for visiting me in the hospital. Oh, you brought me a present … (sound of Denny unwrapping paper). Oh .. my own copy of “Our Bodies / Our Selves” …  Thank You.

I do have two true stories about the OBOS book.

One time when I was 13, I was over at a friend’s house, and his older sister had left out a copy of OBOS. I started reading it, much to my friend’s disgust: “That book is for GIRLS” he teased. Yes, I was aware it was for girls, and also that damn good information was contained within. I had a religious upbringing, so of course I knew nothing about human sexuality. Jesus … I mean Buddha … I did not know anything about lady parts back then. Could it be that Penthouse magazine was lying to me about female sexuality? I needed to find out more of the truth.

“I am doing reconnaissance” I told him. I still remember this one chapter called: “In Amerika, they call us Dikes”. Ha. They used a K.

My second story also goes back to 8^th grade. There was a big controversy at our Junior High school when one of the girl’s Health Ed teachers taught material from “Our Bodies – Ourselves”.  She told the 8^th grade girls that they should – get his — regularly use a mirror in order to look up and examine the insides of their vaginas.

When word of this got out to the parents, they wanted to burn this young teacher at the stake. I remember biking past the school the night of the next PTA meeting. Every damn parking space all over the school and throughout the sports fields were filled with cars, and I saw people pouring in. Any other PTA meeting would have about six people attend, but this time the school rafters were shaking. Parents wanted this teacher FIRED. How dare she teach girls about their own bodies in a course on Sex Education? Of course, looking back, those parents were very ignorant. This was the early 1970s, however. Here in the Midwest we didn’t even know there was such a thing called a “clitoris” until 1971 — two years after the moon landing. These parents thought that sex was dirty, and any teenager who wanted to learn more had to be sinners. Obviously, OBOS was from the Devil.

Look, I am not the expert. I don’t have a clue as to how all those tubes and wires work up there. I DO know that women are the ones in charge of creating life and giving birth. All us guys have to do is just ejaculate, which believe me, is pretty easy. I STRONGLY support any education which encourages young women to stay healthy, and maintain their reproductive facilities. Let’s face it guys, the women have to be the mature ones in human reproductive relationships. Dicks are a dime a dozen.  Happy, healthy and educated young women are the world’s greatest resource.

At 13, I might not have known anything about what goes on up in there, but I would have been willing to learn. (This was light-years before the Internet kids.) Seriously, the hoo-hoo has got to be the world’s most interesting subject. In fact, I am of the opinion that a lady’s hee-hee is where the word “interesting” originates. (I’m running out of alternative terms, for you know).

Meowth in disguise as SunFlora: “Denny promises he’s never gunna say ‘pussy’ again”.

Oh .. The teacher? Well, I was just a dumb 13-year old. So what could I do to save the teacher? She got canned. Too bad, she was young, idealistic and was well liked. She was replaced by a girl’s gym teacher that looked like what a girl’s gym teacher looks like. (Denny holds head:) Ow… All that stuff in OBOS is pretty standard in Health Ed today. It would not be radical today, instead it is the norm.

Starlight: It would be another three years before I would get to look up into one of those beautiful love flowers.

“LuvFlower”? Hey, that might be a good name for a Sunflora!

What is the name of your corn plant or sunflower? Please comment!