Denny Sinnoh's "Akihabara Starlight"

Posts tagged ‘Denny’s Humor’

Maple Forest Seeks Rice Paddy

My employment consists of processing purchase orders and maintaining the application records for an international agricultural chemical fertilizer company. Any writing I do at work is “technical writing” which must be very precise. It is not very creative, and there is no place for humor. Also, the science, journals, technical monographs and trade papers I am required to read are informative, but very dull. I seldom entertain myself at the computer. That’s why I like to occasionally be creative and post articles to WordPress! I also like to read YOUR blog during my lunch hour my dear reader. Your posts are a nice break from the otherwise beaten down day.

Although my trade journal reading is usually mundane, I am sometimes surprised by some of the advertisements and listings in such publications. (The embellishments that a seed drill manufacturer will make for the power of their brand of planter are often highly amusing.)

Last week, I was looking through the “personal interest” section of a periodical and I saw a personal ad that read “Maple Forest seeks Rice Paddy”.

It reads:

Lonely middle-latitude temperate mixed forest, dominantly sugar maple, with minor mixed oak, beech and birch species. Prosperous and stable broadleaf-deciduous biome, but open to new growth patterns. Seeks intimate relationship with recently cultivated tropical or sub-tropical Rice Paddy. Intensive land use relationship is desired. Interested in long-term lowland staple crop production. Possibility of supplemental vegetable growth a plus, but not required. Aerial infrared imagery of my peak vegetation production index is available upon request. Serious inquires only.

(Ahem.) Yes. I think there are some logistics and some harsh climatic realities which must be addressed for such a relationship. I think that if the Maple Forest does find the right Rice Paddy it would probably be a lasting relationship, perhaps because of the forces working against them. Monocots and dicots often make a nice flowering biome, and their pairing may work well.  Maple Forest might feel that he does not have a lot in common with some of the local needle-leaf evergreen forests.

Too many woodland biomes are not long-term compatible, and land cover disruptions are very common. The system seems to be set up against a Maple Forest.  I do so sympathize with the Maple Forest. It is hard for a mixed hardwood forest to find a nice land cover to enjoy biomass production with. He is correct to hold out for an angiosperm environment, even if such environment is from a different climate. Monocots and dicots often make a nice mixed biome, and the pairing might work well.  Some of the regional needle-leaf evergreens complain about it.

Timber land relationships are tough in the modern world, even with the use of the latest Forestry apps and websites. Yes, you have those forests who say they are broad-leaf deciduous, but it turns out they have way too many coniferous species mixed in. The truth is – I don’t care for the cones and needles myself — so I can see why the Maple Forest would be looking elsewhere for biomass. Too often, a woodland will claim to be “upland forest” but will turn out be prone to flooding.  Some of these older woods have serious issues. Many cannot overcome their history of being dominated by some lower-value swamp oaks. Many of these single woodlands are “second growth” who have been clear-cut way too many times. Plus, no one wants to have to put up with the invasive species left from all the previous biomes.

I can see why he would love a Rice Paddy. Their lush dark greens. earthen dams, and irrigation sluices balanced. A softer, welcoming surface. Welcoming, and permeable to depth. The shoots of growth tease her ample production. The power and intensity of her grain.  She is fertile alright. The Maple Forest will wonder: How does she produce so much biomass calories per acre? To the Maple Forest, she puts all those other companion environments from his past to shame. Other forests might tease, and say that he has “paddy fever” but Maple Forest should just shrug that off.

The stillness of her floodplain when at the peak of production is a thing of beauty.  And best of all – she can be double cropped. Oh yeah. Sometimes triple-cropped in a warm year. Wait until the Maple Forest finds out she can support some supplementary aquaculture. The high carbohydrate grain, the mixed vegetables and tubers between fields, and the protein of aquaculture.  God, they are the best. Can a land use be more fantastic than a subtropical Rice Paddy?

That Maple Forest will wonder where Rice Paddy has been all of his century-long growth.  The Rice Paddy is everything that the Maple Forest has ever wanted … and all that he never knew that he wanted. She has awoken xylem flows within his tree trunks that he thought would never flow again.

The Rice Paddy may have to adjust to some of the Maple Forest’s seasonal changes however. They probably first met in early or mid-summer when the Maple Forest is at his most lush and full,  open leaf condition. I will bet that a Rice Paddy has never seen a Maple Forest release its “whirly seeds” on a blustery summer’s day.

His fall color exuberance is followed by the long dormant period, with no leaf production. She might misunderstand. This may be difficult for a subtropical land use to adjust to at first. But don’t worry dear Rice Paddy. This is just the type of cold climate he is adapted to. Your Maple Forest is just taking some down time to harden, and sweeten. He will be back in spring with a gush of syrup production. You just be ready for that, when his sap starts to flow.

Sweet. Yeah, she is going to receive the sweet. So much she might not know what hit her.

Maple Forests and Rice Paddies are just made for each other! Their differences compliment rather than contradict each other. Some of the other biomes will be bitter and jealous of course. Some will laugh at Maple Forest, insult him, and say that he has a subtropical land-use “fetish”. Some landscapes will be envious of Rice Paddy and say she is only after the creation of a new ecotone. Don’t listen to the jealous regions you two. Make the world right for yourselves.

Just keep loving each other kids. Er .. I mean environments.

Starlight: Jesus – look at the time. I have to get back to work … and how did these web pages crop up?

Denny watches a pretty girl pee.

Readers: This very cool and funky song is merely my suggested music track for you to listen to as you read this post. I mean no disrespect to Mariya. Click and enjoy. Which reminds me …

Whoa. I have not posted on WP for a long time. I am in SO MUCH trouble at work. I need to get caught up on all these agricultural fertilizer reports. Yup, I gave up blogging for a while. I have been  a good employee — keeping my nose to the Moonstone. Look, I am even bringing work home where I can do company work on my own PC!

The work is very boring. and I get distracted so easily by these pop ups. Wait — this looks interesting.  An ad for “KornHub”? Well it must be agricultural then, so I will just click over there and … OH MY GOD!!!

Wait — this is interesting. I don’t usually look at video sites like these (Denny coughs). Besides, there is probably something agricultural in here. Ok … typing “nitrogen” into the search box … and …  Hello.

It says if I click there, I can watch a sexy Asian lady urinate. Oh, no no. I could NOT do that. Really. Not my thing. Look I am not a prude, but I draw the line at bodily functions. I could never watch that. That would be perverted. True, I know that it is only “Number 1” … but still.  I am NOT a pervert. These videos are not for me. I don’t have any fetishes.

Besides, although men’s bodies are disgusting, ladies are perfect. Women’s bodies are beautiful, fragrant works of art.  (Denny momentarily loses touch with reality). Pretty girls don’t PEE! Their little hoo-hoos don’t really make that bad stuff  do they? (Denny in denial) How could this video even exist?

I’m NOT going to watch this!!!

Uh … maybe … unless … maybe YOU want to look, my dear Readers … er .… I mean … this one time would not hurt could it? If you say that it is OK … watching a pretty girl take a pee, I will do it. That does not make me a bad person, right? Right? 

OK then (Denny exhales), here goes. CLICK.

Huh …you know, these urinal-on-the-floor-toilets always seemed weird to me. Japan is otherwise so highly technological – so why is it that some basins look like a hole in the floor? … and OH! … There she is. 

I think she likes me, she looked right at me and smiled. So pretty. Whoa … the panties are down … uh … hoo-boy … well, that answers the “hairy or shaved” question. Mystery solved!.

Wow — she IS vert cute.  Hmmmm … so beautiful in there ... so interesting … she seems like she has good balance. I wonder what led her to film this?

OK, this event should start any minute. (Denny watching, waiting).

It is always entertaining to see up a nice lady’s hoo hoo. There are all these wonderful grooves and folds. Fluids reflecting and refracting.  So Interesting … so very interesting.

Alright … gunna happen soon … (Denny glances at watch).

You know, you can find a lot of meaning, and answers to the big questions in the universe looking in there … I know you will think it strange … but you know what? I think I just saw the answer to a quadratic equation problem that I never finished back in 7th grade math …

… Hmmmm  … still waiting here. It is a nice view and everything, but nothing is happening.

Ha. Penny for your thoughts, dear girl. She is smiling, but she should be thinking about running water. It’s gotta start any second now …

Uh … still waiting. (Denny’s mind wanders) Gee, I wonder how many miles I put on the Volkswagen last week. Darn it — I should go check … I think I am due for an oil change … and OH MY there it goes!!!

So …

Uh huh … OK … right … OK … so … so that is what it looks like. Ahem.

Starlight: I really do need to get back to work.

This is a photo of the famous Kegon Falls in Japan. What?

Special Warm and Hopeful New Year’s Day Greetings from the Butt of Ms. Mayu Watanabe

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Ha Ha. Maybe I should call this post “Happy New REAR.”  Ha Ha Ha. Who better than to give you wishful New Year’s Day greetings than the rear end of AKB48 idol Mayu Watanabe? As much as I love Watanabe-san, her butt is so other-worldly cute, that sometimes it seems as if her butt has a personality all of its own.

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I have translated the butt’s comments from the original Japanese, but as you will see … Mayuyu’s derriere speaks an international language, easily understood by anyone.

Begin butt transmission:

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Mayu’s Butt: “A fresh new year is once again upon us.”

http://www.idolfile.com/

Mayu’s Butt continues: “It is the time to be thankful for the blessings of the past year and to take stock of all our achievements.”

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The magic tukhus continues: “We relish old memories … but a promising and a fulfilling new year is waiting just for you! Open your arms and behold it with grace and mirth. Grab it … Just grab it!”

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More blessings from the bum: “New Year 2017 is a brand new year to start afresh, to start strong, and yet get another chance to do everything we wanted to do this past year …”

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The pretty patootie pontificates:  “The amazing thing with chances is how we get them every year. So, set positive goals and try to be realistic.”

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Her cute butt continues: “Hang the wish list up where you can see them every day of the New Year – and continue to be excited for what you can achieve this 2017.”

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Mayuyu’s rear end rages again: “In the meantime, enjoy the fireworks, look forward to those loud and boisterous family dinners, or maybe just have a quiet intimate meal with your loved one.”

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Mayu’s tail, continues the tale: “Let someone you know– or maybe everyone you know – that you remembered them today, and that you value their friendship!”

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The idol’s sweet cheeks conclude: “I hope that the lamps of joy lighten up your year, fill your days with sparkles of joy, and brighten up your life forever and ever.”

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Thank you Butt-of-Mayuyu. You’ve said it all.

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Zero in on her “I need you” moment from a “Heavy Rotation” performance (in available super HD) linked here.

Heh heh … Hoo boy … now where did every body go?.

Starlight: HAPPY NEW YEAR 2017 EVERYONE !

See more Mayuyu on my Pinterest board for her LINKED HERE.

Today’s Guest Blogger: Miss Yuki Kashiwagi on “How to avoid groin injuries”.

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I’ve been feeling the aging pains again today. Instead of a music video, I have asked AKB and NGT48 member Miss Yuki Kashiwagi to fill in. I have translated her article below:

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Next time she will tell us how to avoid wrist injuries.

Yuki begins:

“Having had strained muscles during my onstage, I can tell you that there is no injury that creates more problems in most aspects of sports or dancing. You sometimes have no clue just how much these muscles were used or abused until you are significantly injured. It can keep an Idol out for weeks while it heals.

I encourage flexibility in the groin area. Stretching is absolutely required, as well as some regular adductor strengthening. Warm up by stretching the groin muscles before exercising. Stretching can increase your range of motion and reduce stiffness and pain. It is also important during the cool-down phase of exercise when your muscles are warm. Increase the intensity and length of  your exercise program gradually.

AKB48 Yuki Kashiwagi Love Yukirin Stretching

As your fitness level improves, you will be able to do more intense dancing without injury.

Wear supportive, well-cushioned shoes for running, aerobics, and walking. A good warm-up is very important: I suggest some stationary cycling, groin stretching, sumo squats, side lunges, and some kneeling pelvic tilts

(Denny edit: Um … I had to look up “kneeling pelvic tilts”)

Strength-building exercise machines should be part of your regular routine. I like ball squeezes. I often use different-size balls, concentric adduction against gravity, cable/elastic standing adduction, or the seated adduction machine.

Use a slide board adductor used with the slide board forward, then the slide board with simultaneous adduction. I spread my legs and bring both together at the same time. Also one-legged lunges are part of my routine.

(Denny’s edit: Yukirin, … we are talking about PREVENTING injury, right?)

Even when not-working out, you can still take preventative measures in your everyday activities. Drink extra water, especially in hot or humid weather. This can help prevent muscle cramps or stiffness.

(Denny’s edit: I can’t tell you the problem I have with stiffness in the morning.)

Use a step stool when reaching for high objects you silly. Try not to stand on chairs or other objects. Never climb stairs with both hands full. Do not strain to lift or carry objects. Get help carrying heavy or awkward objects. I find it easy to get a helper guy to carry my stuff. They are always so enthusiastic!

I hope I have been helpful! Wouldn’t you rather put in some time preventing injury rather spending time backstage waiting for it to heal?”

yuki results

Love, Yukirin – x o xo : )

Thanks Yukirin! Hey, you know when I heard that you were going to be in NGT48, I thought it was a new type of SPORTSCAR!  

Ha. … Ha … wait .. Oh, don’t tell me I’m the only one who thought that …

Starlight:  I would work out “Everyday” if it was with Yuki : )

Good GIF Charlie Brown! These are my favorite members of the AKB48 Family!

Good Grief … I miss the girls. That being said, I still want to share another 16-member “dream team” of my favorite idols. Of course I am going to make lame jokes in the captions. Some of my references are decades old. If you can think of better captions, I look forward to your comments.

Now that Minami Takahasi is about to graduate, there are new additions, and some shake-ups in my lineup. Also, this time, I want to share some moving pictures … Enjoy! .. and please comment — I get lonely fan-boying all by myself.

# Sixteen: Haruka Shimazaki – AKB48

haruka handles the meat giphy

Cooking Challenges? Paruru says that there is NO KIND OF MEAT that she cannot handle!

# Fifteen: Mako Kojima – AKB48

mako loses at mario kart

Ha! Young Kojima-san still cannot beat me in “Mario Kart”.  HA!!! I hit her with a green shell, just as she was about to cross the finish line!

# Fourteen: Kei Jonishi – NMB48

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Denny: Oh, no! … Don’t say that routine AGAIN Kei …

Kei: “Jonshi??? Well, my name is Kei Keicchi Jonishi … you can call me RAY,  you can call me KEI, you can call me KEICCHI, you can call me K-CHI, you can call me J-SHI, you can call me SUNNY, you can call me KJ … but yas doesn’t have to call me Jonshi.”

# Thirteen: Haruka Nakagawa – JKT48

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If you just got up five minutes earlier, Harugon, you would not be late for practice!!!

# Twelve: Miyuki Watanabe – NMB48

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It does not look like it is ANYONE’S secret anymore Milky-chan!

# Eleven: Jurina Matsui – SKE48

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Jurina, take it from AL BUNDY: Graduate with a degree. You do not want to wind up selling ladies’ shoes!

# Ten: Yui Yokoyama – AKB48

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The last thing TakaMina saw, the moment before she graduated!

# Nine: Haruna Kojima – AKB48

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Far be it for me to criticize anyone’s religion KojiHaru … You go ahead and say your nightly prayers the way that you want to.

# Eight: Sayaka Yamamoto – NMB48

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Your hair? … No Sayanee, I do not think anyone noticed that your HAIR was slightly out of place.

# Seven: Minami Minegishi – AKB48

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No Miichan!!! … Darn it, I am going to SMACK that guy who told Miichan that this was the proper way that American women greet each other at formal U.S. embassy meetings.

# Six: Aika Ota – HKT48

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Lovetan — Jim Morrison called, he says NOT to sing it like that if you want to sound “deep”. That is heavy, Love-tan … heavy.

# Five: Mayu Wantanabe – AKB48

mayu finds scientology

… Well Miss Watanabe, as we will be sitting next to each other for more than nine hours on this car drive …  you go right ahead and tell me everything I need to know about Scientology.

# Four: Sakura Miyawaki – HKT48

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What went wrong when Sakura-tan auditioned for “The Karate Kid 5” …

# Three: Haruka Kodama – HKT48

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Harrupi looked like she COULD NOT BELIEVE IT — when I showed her how “Nestles’ Quick” works!

# Two: Yuki Kashiwagi – NGT48

yuki kashiwagi traditional tuber dish

NO! … What is WRONG with you people? Don’t you know that ground up tororo root is a traditional Japanese food. NO! I was NOT thinking that … I wouldn’t … I like Yukirin, … oh God, NO … I never …

# One: Iwasa Misaki – AKB48!!! … as if you would have any doubt!

Sorry that I got carried away with that confetti snow Wasamin!

Starlight: Four decades of Pop Cultural references!

 

 

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See the #fireworks I created by blogging on #WordPressDotCom. My 2015 annual report.

I have not seen Wasamin this excited -- since I found that coupon for a discount of 50 yen off wax paper!

I have not seen Wasamin this excited — since I found that coupon for the discount of 50 yen off wax paper!

See the fireworks Denny Sinnoh created by blogging on WordPress.com. Check out their 2015 annual report.

Source: See the #fireworks I created by blogging on #WordPressDotCom. My 2015 annual report.

A song? Of course we cannot end without a song. Remember this great moment from Halloween?

Starlight: (gulp)

Favorite members of the AKB48 Family – “Dog Days” edition.

I could have just said “August” edition. The phrase “dog days” often refers to the end of summer. The star Sirius (the dog star) — is visible in late summer. This time is often the hottest time of year in many climates. Hot. Serious.

Right …  let us get right to cute photos of my favorite members! This time I will present my list in descending order, just to make it that much more suspenseful. Plus, there have been a few “shake-ups” since my last list.

My 16 member “dream team” would be …

16. Kei Jonishi

Kei Jonishi Trench Coat

You are correct Kei …  “It is always darkest … just before they turn on the lights!

15. Yui Yokoyama

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No, Yuihan — Rick, Carl and Dale had already left the prison LAST year.

14. Minami Minegishi

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I said “make that EXTRA VIRGIN”, Miichan. If you are going to cook authentic Italian, make sure that the olive oil is extra virgin

13. Haruka Shimazaki

paruru not wendy

Don’t look so sad Paruru, no one was more disappointed than I was when we found out you were turned down to be the new symbol for “Wendy’s”.

12. Minami Takahashi

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Every kid knows that a bath is not any fun unless you have something to play with!

11. Haruka Nakagawa

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Whew. I am also very happy your bicycle seat was returned Haruka. Who on Earth could have taken it? Just glad it’s back!

10. Jurina Matsui

jurina with umbrella

Ok, so when the Witch comes out of the little German house, that means it will be CLEAR … but when Jurina comes out, that means that it will RAIN? I’m OK with that.

9. Miyuki Watanabe

miyuki molting

(Denny wispering and imitating David Attenborough) We are in luck. Few biologists have been fortunate enough to catch a wild Milky during her “molting” phase.

8. Haruna Kojima

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Make up your mind Kojima san … are you in the “bloods” or the “crips”?

7. Sayaka Yamamoto

sayaka hides the key

Guess where Sayanee hid the key to the iron gate she is waiting behind.

6. Sakura Miyawaki

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How can I join the “Big Dango Family” Sakura-tan?

5. Aika Ota

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Can I park my scooter at your playhouse Love-tan?

4. Mayu Watanabe

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This happens every time Mayuyu gets an idea!

3. Haruka Kodama

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Ah, Haruka Kodama, brought to you by the letter “N” … or is that a “W” … what letter are you trying to make again Haruppi?

2. Yuki Kashiwagi

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“Wimpy Kid?” … not if it is the diary of Yukirin!

Now for my #1, my oshi … the champion from Chiba … the kami in kimono … the empress of enka …

1. Iwasa Misaki

wasamin throws out first pitch

Oddly, Wasamin’s ERA is lower than the entire staff of the Seattle Mariners!

Sing for me Misaki-san.

I (heart) you Wasamin, and all the girls! Thanks for a great summer of music videos!

Starlight: Only 8.6 light years to Sirius, but Fanboy love travels faster than the speed of light.

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Having Breakfast with HKT48!

I know ... where does Haruppi put it?

I know … where does Haruppi put it?

Begin the day / With a friendly voice/ A companion unobtrusive / Plays that song that’s so elusive / And the magic music makes your morning mood …”  

Thanks, Neil, but I know you did not have this genre in mind when you wrote that. Nonetheless, it certainly is inspirational to hear/see the HKT48 girls early in the AM. I like listening/watching HKT48 YouTube playlists on my iPhone during breakfast. They girls are true to the spirit that you wrote about. You know, they would have been good on AM radio. Right up there with the Archies.

I have been so happy and entertained by these lovely young women — my adopted daughters from Hawkstown. I think I like the HKT48 even more than the main AKB group now. These youngsters have so much pep, and they sing and dance with such energy and enthusiasm. This is Idol music the way it is supposed to be … like a milkshake that never ends!

First off — lets hear “12 seconds” while the coffee finishes brewing. This is my song of the summer! … or at least my favorite in the Idol genre. You will not need any sugar in your Breakfast Blend. Aika Ota is sweet enough! Good example: see time 1:39 – 1:42 seconds. Lovetan is not even singing at that point … she just poses … but …

Love-tan you are KILLING me. At least my heart is started.

This next one goes back to HKT48 Dome Concert in 2013. This is probably the CUTEST idol duet I have ever seen. That is Aoi Motomura in the hot pants, and Sakura Miyawaki in the skirt. Musically, I think that one part is stolen from “Be My Baby” by The Ronnettes. The young Sakura-tan is so adorable here so I will not quibble Akimoto’s possible theft.

I could not be more proud (tearing up a bit). Future Anthropologists should study Sakura’s moves in order to define and understand what a Japanese Idol should be. Sakura is pure joy in a bottle. She is like a little piece of God piercing a hole in the fabric of space-time into our universe. Through this teenage girl, we might then be able to comprehend new dimensions … and a higher plane of consciousness. …Um, … Did you put something in my coffee?

sakuratan in ookami to pride 2013

Um … Now this next one is lower video quality, but that is OK because I’m dancing while I reheat these eggs anyway. A better quality video is available, but you have to be on YouTube. I grock that heart shape at the end.

Remember when The Beatles used to sing “Yeah, Yeah, Yeah”? Have you ever wondered what it would be like if you added ONE MORE “YEAH”? Find out here. I like this one because this PV features HKT48’s youngest member Yuka Akiyoshi. I own underwear older than her. She’s a little rascal alright!

This next one is from a great mini-concert outside of the HawksTown Mall last year. They cover their big-sister’s hit single “Baby Baby Baby”. Much of the video is down shot at floor level — kind of like a Yasujiro Ozu film. Like the late, great Ozu-sama, the HKT48 kids gave me a great “Late Spring”. The crowd LOVES it!

The next one is “Tenshi no Shippo”. After a introduction by Aika Ota (to time 0:27 seconds), the trio performs this Akihabara Theater favorite.

Warning: Tails are shown in this dance video! (Denny eating too fast and rambling): I like the animated balloon background. The dancing is super cute, and it reminds me of CHAM. Sometimes these performance videos don’t have the greatest sound. It sounds a little like the girls are at the end of a tunnel. The 21-year old Ota-san is a little flirtatious here. Hmmm …

“Angel Tail” you say Love-tan? “MOE! MOE!!”

“Modestly, I love You?”.  Ha Ha, at first Google Translate had it as “Conservative I Love You”.  There are so many performance videos of this out there on so many shows. The dancing is always great. I love how the song mixes some English words in with the Japanese. I think I like the performance videos of this better than the official music video. While that official music video (linked here) is glorious color eye candy, that video is cut so quickly you can hardly get a look at your favorite idol when her cloud passes by. (Forget YOU – Rolling Stones!)

Oh, man, we need to get going. I could watch these all day. Let’s have one more cup of coffee, and watch one more. This is another cover of an older AKB48 song, but it is a perfect match for the younger HKT48. The sound is “muddled dome” because of the distance … but DID YOU SEE THOSE CUTE BOOTS AND HATS!?!?

Oh. wow I am so late … I don’t think I can finish my melon juice! The kids sing with the Japanese mascot Funassyi – who is actually a “Pear Fairy” not a melon.

(Plus, I have already been blamed for looking at melons when I wasn’t … but that is a rant for another meal).

Starlight: “Off on your way / Hit the open road / There is magic at your fingers / For the spirit ever lingers / Undemanding contact / In your happy solitude …”

You and me both Neil.

Happy Birthday Miss Kashiwagi! / Krazy Kool Kashiwagi Kaptions

Yukiring

Dear Yukirin,

I know that I have not been able to use WordPress much lately, however I wanted to be the first in my time zone to wish you a HAPPY BIRTHDAY on July 15th. Japan is 12 hours ahead of me, so I wanted to time my greeting before you start going out to nightclubs and such tonight. Be careful, young one!

Uncle Denny.

Everyone else: Please enjoy my tribute to Yuki Kashiwagi  柏木 由紀  (Kashiwagi Yuki), born July 15, 1991 in Kagoshima Prefecture of Kyushu, Japan. The delightful Yukirin was born in the shadow of Mount Sakurajima, an active strato-volcano! (Ask a Geology-nerd what that is).

Yukirin is my second-favorite AKB Member … and the subject of my photo tribute for her special day.

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You know, except for the salt, this WAS my dream last night, Yukirin.

isaidtakedownthedrapes

Yuki-chan … I said TAKE DOWN the drapes not WEAR them!

http://www.b-idol.com/bbs1/

CLUE:  OK, I have Colonel Mustard … with the Candlestick … in the Library … Or was it all Yukirin ?.

yuki an apple a day

Remember Yukirin: an apple a day …  er … uh … um … er … heh heh .. what was I saying?

show up with Doritos then Yuki

Note for future reference: All I had to do was show up at the pool party holding a bag of “Doritos” and Miss Kashiwagi immediately kicked off her shorts!

Yuki-Kashiwagi-obama callled told

Kashiwagi-sama: Obama called, he said something about you “getting off your high horse” …

Yuki-Kashiwagi-clint eastwood called

… then Clint Eastwood called. He says you can KEEP the chair now.

yukiwenttofinishingschool

(Denny imitating British actor Sir John Gielgud) Yes, I know that you went to “Finishing School” dear girl, I can still smell the varnish!

help me yukirin i have scurvey

Help me Yukirin! I think I have scurvey!

ohyourememberedmyfavoriteflavor

Yes, indeed! You did bring my favorite flavor Yukirin!

i have the same kilt

Aye, Yukirin, I have the same kilt meself.

schlitz beer 6b843bc4cea9dc495b1a0de803162209

Are you kidding Yuki? Auto workers in the USA LOVE Schlitz beer!

http://www.b-idol.com

HA! Well, I will have you know that I made a FORTUNE in weight guessing young lady!

there you are honey

Yuki?  Yuki?  Oh, there you are HONEY  … 

wait let me turn off the wind

WHAT??? … WHAT??? Wait, let me turn OFF the wind machine Yukirin!

yukineedsanewsetofclothes

Last time I lend Yukirin my credit card number.

extended warranty

Yes, Miss Kashiwagi, I would be happy to give you my 100,000 mile “bumper-to-bumper” extended warranty !

yourerightidoneeddoorknockers

You are CORRECT Yukirin, this place does need a good set of door-knockers!

yuki stay at the y

Yes, thank you for the recommendation Yukirin, indeed I think I will “stay at the Y” tonight!

volume half full

Some say the volume is half-full, some say it is half-empty. I say “sit down you morons” I can’t see Yukirin!

warmandfuzzyfeelings

What?!?  I will have you people know that I only have “warm and fuzzy” feelings for Kashiwagi-san.

yuki two seam fastball

Yes, thank you for explaining how your “two seam fastball” breaks down-and-in on right-handed batters. Oh, and how can I get one of those “milk-fed” mustaches?

oksowhereisthesmoke

Please do not be JEALOUS ladies, Yuki only looks this good because she “does it all with mirrors”.

So much Yuki! … so little room. Enjoy my retrospective Yukirin SlideShow!

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Happy Birthday Miss Kashiwagi!

I wish I could do justice to how talented Ms. Kashiwagi is. She is a trooper. I wanted to link some performance videos of her amazing 3rd solo concert, however Record Industry Weasels have removed every last one! … every last one!

See more Yukirin on my Pinterest board linked here.

 

Image

My tastes are NOT “Vanilla” !

Mirei Kiritani vanilla

I look at this and wonder if I will be eating beaver …

When someone asks my favorite ice cream flavor I always say “vanilla” — but often to a look of indignant disbelief. “You must be boring” they think. I guess my tastes are vanilla – but I am referring to the real vanilla.

“Vanilla” does NOT mean “flavorless.” Vanilla IS a flavor.

Good_Vanilla-Bean-Ice-Cream

I also think that vanilla complements the true flavor of ice cream better than other flavors. Oh you can have your “50 shades” of different syrups if you want. Maybe you want to try it all, that’s OK. You have the right to experiment a little — but you are deviating from what is really ice cream.  If you have to dress your ice cream with all kinds of syrups, nuts, springy-jelly things and the like, then I would say that you are missing the point of ice cream! That weird stuff is NOT a real ice cream experience.

Somehow in your mind all those strange add-on things are taking the place of the real ice cream. I will just mash my face in vanilla thank you.

Just the vanilla ice cream is all I need. Me, my mouth, and the ice cream. I love how I get that “pre taste” from the ice cream just as my mouth glides to it.  The anticipation — the excitement — the electricity. Before my mouth is even on it I can perceive the affective flavor.  My tongue will glide forward, that’s when I am hit with my favorite flavor. My mouth and the mounds of creamy goodness become intertwined. Real vanilla is rich, deep and luxurious. Toppings? I do not want or need anything weird or distracting.

Vanilla is not “bland” – in fact, real vanilla is a very intense and sumptuous flavor. Vanilla flavor is derived from the orchid pods of Vanilla planifolia, a flower indigenous to Central America. There are three sub-species of Vanilla, the best and most famous is “Bourbon vanilla” aka “Madagascar vanilla”.

vanillaflowerlongitudinalsection

The wonderful flavor comes from a special place near the ovaries.

Madagascar and surrounding Indian Ocean counties are where much of the world’s commercial vanilla is grown. Check that bottle of vanilla extract in your cupboard! I bet it says that it is a product of Madagascar. I hope it does.

I love the scent and taste of vanilla extract! … as long as it is the real thing. When I purchase vanilla ice cream, I never buy those with “artificial” flavoring. There I might agree … THAT artificial vanilla is boring. You might as well just be eating a picture of vanilla, because “that ain’t vanilla.” Nothing artificial should be part of the ice cream experience.

Let me warn you, there is another way to obtain — quotes: “natural flavoring” — of vanilla. Extract from the anal oil glands of beavers is used to create “vanilla” flavoring. (No, I am NOT making that up.) Now, the real Vanilla sp. plant is very labor expensive because it must be hand pollinated. (The plant can only be pollinated by a species of bee found only in a small region of Middle America.)

The substitute vanilla, made from beaver, is very common in ice cream packaged as “naturally flavored” vanilla.  You see, if you create a vanilla-like flavor from an animal – then that legally counts as “natural”. It is just our human taste chemistry. Thus, the best part of a beaver tastes like rich, creamy vanilla.

I admit, I like to eat the beaver on occasion. You have probably licked beaver yourself. It is highly likely that you were munching the furry rodent if have eaten some “naturally flavored” vanilla.  Naturally flavored, but not naturally flavored with Madagascar vanilla – naturally flavored with – ahemyou know.

Pick up some “vanilla bean” ice cream today, and dive into its intoxicating creamy flavor.

https://www.beanilla.com/madagascar-vanilla-beans

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vanilla

http://voices.nationalgeographic.com/2013/10/01/beaver-butts-emit-goo-used-for-vanilla-flavoring/

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castoreum

EAT_BEAVER_RK

They should wait, maybe the dessert will be “naturally flavored”.

Starlight: I can’t count how many times I was actually munching the furry rodent. 

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