Denny Sinnoh's "Akihabara Starlight"

Archive for the ‘Culture’ Category

How to write an anti-Japanese Idol article or blog post

In my continuing series of blogging posts of “How to write more gooder”, my topic today is a special one!

How to make an anti-Japanese Idol article or blog post, similar to the garbage in The Japan Times or RocketNews.*

Step #1 – Title your article something salacious such as “Japan’s Pervert Culture” or “Weird Japanese Music Fans and the Idols They Worship.”

Step #2 – Broach topics in the opening paragraphs elements about the Japanese pornography industry, prostitution, pedophilia, etc.

Step #3 – Important: Conflate these social ills with Japanese Idol singers. Make sure to mention AKB48 or other popular idol groups.

Step #4 – Be harshly critical of Idol music. Link an Idol music video, but not an artistic one. Chose one in which in your narrow mind, you think is the silliest. Then write:  “see how terrible it is…” Important: Make sure to not reveal your own vulgar musical tastes. This is especially true if you enjoy violent “thug” performances. If we heard what you actually like, no one would take you seriously.

Step #5 – Insert older photos of AKB48 throughout these steps– you may be able to confuse the readers. Include some of the members interacting with fans, and they will associate the group with pornography and prostitution.

Step #6 – Mention that Yashushi Akimoto is “literally Hitler”.  Otherwise dig up older scandals which have long since been debunked. If you repeat the lies enough, then you make them true.

Denny lisping just like a Social Justice Warrior: “Liturali Hitluur”.

Step #7 – Open the article to comments, but then make sure to delete all of Derek Vasconi’s well reasoned comments. If someone gives an alternative opinion– you might not be right!


*RocketNews, now called SoraNews24 is the Gold Standard for ignorance about Idol culture. No one knows less about Idols than them, although there are some blogs on WordPress that come close.


Kimonos on Someday: Hanako Oku’s O-mikuji is read at her Hatsumode

It is a lovely kimono – and what a lovely smile!

This photo was posted on the official Oku Hanako website on January 7:

Ms. Oku-san is at a Shinto shrine, her first visit to a shrine this year.

The Japanese term “Hatsumōde” refers to a person’s first shrine visit of the New Year. Typically, it refers to a visit to a Shinto shrine, however a visit to a Buddhist temple is sometimes done. The translated page indicates that she admitted she has not visited a shrine in a long time. She also says it has been a long time since she wore a kimono! Oku-in-kimono photos are almost impossible to find.

She is doing that smirk, because that scroll she is reading is her O-mikuji.

An “O-mikuji” is a rolled or folded preprinted fortune which is purchased by making a small offering at the shrine.

I cannot tell from her post what the fortune reads, but she seems a bit amused — and maybe more than a bit skeptical about the prediction.

Perhaps the fortune predicts “at long last an unrequited love will be fulfilled”!

That would be great … but then she would be out of a job … Ha Ha … Oh.

Starlight: Missed this by only a month!

A song? Oh, OF COURSE you get a song!


Pokémon Nicknames: Ducklett and Swanna

Ducklett (in Japanese: コアルヒー ” Koaruhie”) is a Water and Flying dual type Pokémon. It was introduced in the Unova Region (Pokémon Black and White, or Generation V) in 2011. It evolves into  Swanna (in Japanese: スワンナ “Swanna” ) at level 35 where it remains a Water/Flying dual-type. Reference: Bulbapedia.

I envision that these two Unova waterfowl would like the lake environments of northeastern North America, the Unova Region being New York. I like to give male Ducklett names like “St. Lawrence” or “Hudson Bay”.  Any of the names of the Great Lakes would be a good name.  “Ontario” is my favorite male Ducklett name.  I also like Canadian references, “Toronto” for example.

I’m am not sure if I could ever get down from this duck! 

Ha! Other duck jokes are linked hereQuebec” or “Quebec Quack” are good sounding duck names. (I can almost hear in my mind’s ear those quacking sounds. Make that — French quacking sounds.) These names are based on “Quebecois” or Québécois  the name for French Canadian nationalists who want Quebec Province to gain independence from Canada. “Le Duc” or “Frenchie” may be interesting names. “Niagara” is named after the famous waterfalls American newlyweds go to. “Adirondack” after the mountain and lake region in upstate New York which is a great source of drinking water for NY.

A Pokémon duck could be named “Duck-Duck-Go“, after the search engine. Users are moving to Duck-Duck-Go because they are tired of Google’s censoring of ideas, and the burying of articles which are counter to Google’s corporate narrative. Just ask James Damore .

You may think of your own “lake” names for these waterfowl.  Famous lake names like “Titicaca” are amusing. I wanted to name one after the “Lady of the Lake” from the King Author legend, but there are not enough spaces.

Everyone know the tale of the “Ugly Duckling” who grew up to be a beautiful swan. So that means the duck in the story was really not a duck. A young Swan somehow got mixed in with duck eggs? Or maybe a mother Swan on somebody’s farm died, and a farmer put the Swan egg in with a mother Duck’s eggs. The poor bird, thought it was abnormal, grew up a troubled youth, when in fact it was actually superior to the other fowl. Lesson learned. Some people do better as adults.

I can see how there is a 50-50 ratio of Male-Female Ducklett, but I think that Swanna looks female by default. I prefer a female Swanna, as it has those two blue breast plates. They look like bra cups … which would not look right on male waterfowl. I like a Swanna to have a high Special Attack stat, and teach it moves like Air Cutter, Scald or   Ice Beam. The animation kinda looks like the beam is coming out of the breast plates. This reminds me that maybe a male could shoot out a beam, if he were using special “Power Pasties”.  What are power pasties you ask? Well obviously you are not familiar with the famous scene from the cult film Flesh Gordon. Oh, the seventies … and I digress.

Swanee” could be a name after the song “Way Down Upon The Swanee River” which was often sung in minstrel shows. You have to take that in a historical context. The actual name of the real river is spelled “Suwanee” after the American Indians who lived there.

Of course, “Swan Lake” is a great name, after the famous Tchaikovsky ballet.

You might think of “Black Swan” after the movie.

The shiny version of Swanna is purple, not black however.

You may also want to consider other “duck” names I have used for waterfowl Pokémon. Please see my links here for Psyduck and Farfetch’d.

What is the name for your lucky-duck-turns-into-swan transformation? Please comment!


Kimonos on Monday — My daughter Sakura is finally an ADULT!

Kimonos on Monday — Sakura-tan is an ADULT!

My lovely daughter* Sakura Miyawaki has had her “Coming of Age Day” on January 8, 2018. (Japan is 12 hours ahead of my time zone.) This means that the mega-talented and incredibly adorable twenty-year old is accepting the responsibilities of being an adult.

The Shinto ceremony was held at Kanda shrine in Tokyo.

According to the AKB Daily website (article linked here), a total of forty members of the AKB48 family participated in this year’s event. This is the largest number of participants in the group’s history.

This large number of participants is not surprising, as there has been a significant amount of expansion of the AKB Family in recent years.

Sakura with the other HKT48 members who have turned twenty this year.  Oh I can remember when this group was only knee high to a June bug.

I will try to post more COA day photos/links from the AKB groups as they become available. Also, you can see more of the lovely Miss Miyawaki on her Twitter page linked here.

Look at those sleeves — at first I thought Sakura’s kimono was a tie-dye.

My friends over at 48 Talk also mention the event in their podcast yesterday. I highly recommend their video blog for AKB fans!

*Starlight:  You probably figured out that Sakura-tan is NOT REALLY my daughter …


Pokémon Nicknames: Caterpie, Metapod and Butterfree

Pokémon Nicknames:

Caterpie (in Japanese: キャタピー  “Caterpie”), Metapod (in Japanese: トランセル “Trancell”), and Butterfree (in Japanese: バタフリー “Butterfree”) are all Bug-type Pokémon. (Source: Bulbapedia.) Butterfree becomes a dual type Bug/Flying, and it very easy to level up. You only need to level up Caterpie to level 7 to make it a Metapod, and it evolves again to Butterfree at the low-level of 10.

(Denny imitating Tony Soprano). “Levelin’ up deese bugs? – Fugghetaboudit!”

You can encounter these bugs in your Generation 1 game, and you also encounter them in the first patch of grass you visit in Pokémon Sun/Moon and the new Ultra Sun/Ultra Moon games. Caterpie is usually an early member of most player’s team. “String Shot” is a useful move in the early game.

Caterpie is a Caterpillar, but it looks like a cute “Sweetie Pie”, so you could use that name. A sweet little munching Caterpillar, yeah, that will work. Of course, if you are a dark, “edgy” kind of player, you might like the name “PewDiePie” after the famous YouTube creator. Caterpie’s antennae looks like a big red letter “Y”, so you could name it “Ate-at-the-Y” after the joke where your friend asks you if you are hungry, and you reply “I already ate at the Y”. (Because you are a paid member of the local YMCA.)

My favorite name for Metapod is “Fuhgetabodit”. Remember that you only have twelve spaces for a name, so one cannot use the original Fugghetaboudit – which is an Italian-American slang contraction of the phrase “forget about it”. There are different ways to spell the word, but there is only one correct way to say it. Here, try it yourself:

Ha! An upper-class British guy trying to sound like an Italian-American from Jersey. If you are like me, and you use the Wondertrade a lot, you receive a lot of weak Caterpies and Metapods. I like to send over a Metapod, and the Wondertrade captions says “Denny sent over … Fuhgetabodit”. Ha. … as in you can forget about receiving a special or useful Pokémon this time. Also, you can fuhgetabodit — because with a very small move set, Metapod really is not very good at battling (Insert lame joke about the move “Harden” here). I also like to use “Hard Knocks” as in “the school of hard knocks”.

Denny contemplates this joke … fuhgetabodit!

Butterfree’s name is based on the saying, the book and the movie Butterflies Are Free”. Consider these names for Butterfree:

96 Tears” after the famous Mysterians song in the 1960s — because Butterfree has compound eyes with 96 parts.  “Y.U. Buggin”  – after what my friend who imitates the “rap” dialect sometimes says. “Margarine” because it is BUTTER-FREE, get it! “Flapper” as in the 1920s ladies fashion style. “Effect” after “the Butterfree effect“. Ha, tricked you.

Butterfree’s eyes somewhat resemble those of Venonat, so you may consider my names for it linked here.

Please enjoy the Butterfree cosplay!

I wouldn’t mind using some butter right now!

What is the name for your hard little bug? Please comment!



Kimonos on Monday: Photos of my Iwasa Misaki concert DVD covers and insert booklets.

“Forget blogging.” That is what I tell myself. I am in so much trouble at work for being such a deadwood employee, that I feel guilty even posting a few photos. I had been wanting to write a review of Iwasa Misaki’s first solo concert DVD last year, but never could. Then she released another solo concert earlier this year. Both are great concerts. There is this inner scream inside me that just wants to tell someone about them …

If I cannot write about them, perhaps some of my readers would be interested in coming over to my house, and we can watch them together. Then I can tell you all about them. I will have some cupcakes we can share, while I give my commentary … We can make an afternoon out of it!

Failing that, I can at least share some of the photo cards and insert pamphlet art which came with the DVDs. Of course, Misaki-san wears beautiful kimonos through most of it.

Next time, I would like to write about my Iwasa Misaki CDs. Each CD came with a unique photo card included … and … oh.

(Denny sighs).

Starlight: If only I could write “Akihabara Starlight” for a living …


Pokémon Nicknames: Sandygast and Palossand

Alola Cousins!!! — I am ALL AGOG this week!

Sandygast (in Japanese: スナバァ  “Sunaba”) is a GHOST and GROUND dual-type introduced in Pokémon Suna and Moon’s Alola region (Generation 7). (See Bulbapedia for full descriptions.)  Sandygast is basically a pile of sand with a shovel stuck in its head, as if someone would be digging in sand. It has a wide open mouth – caught in a perpetual scream perhaps? “Sandy Gasp” may be a good name as this Pokémon appears to be gasping.

It is hard to ignore the big gaping hole in Sandygast. Is a hole in sand even possible? When ever I try to dig a hole in sand, it immediately fills in. If you could dig a permanent gaping hole in beach sand it would probably become some type of tourist attraction.

Another gaping, ghostly sand name I like to use is “All Agog“, or “I’m-All-Agog“. (Cough) … When you are surprised or shocked — your mouth might drop open in surprise, right? Just like this nice lady here:

I have to wonder why she is “all agog” here … it is almost like she might be expecting something.

I like this Pokémon, although I usually do not think about ghosts when I am on a beach. I understand why it is a ground type – but a ghost? When you are on the beach, do you think of Sun, fun, pretty girls in bikinis, the smell of coconut oil on the girls … and … GHOSTS? Really? I like that this Pokémon is unusual, and it was just what the series needed.

Sandygast evolves into Palossand (in Japanese: シロデスナ  “Sirodethna”) starting at level 42. Palossand sounds like “Pile-of-Sand” but it is actually not an amorphous pile, instead it is shaped like a sandcastle.

You can just name it “Sand Castle” or “MySandCastle” as that would be cute enough. I caught one in a timer ball, and named it “Sands-o-Time” … which is clever, don’t you think? My favorite Sandygast/Palossand nickname is “GoPoundSand!” which is of course, an alternative way to say “F*ck off!” without actually swearing. The name “Sand Trap” or “Sandy Trapp” might be good, as “traps” are apparently popular these days.

Something very cool about Sandygast and Palossand are that the shiny versions are black. This is because volcanic sand is black. If I ever catch a shiny Sandygast I will name her “Black Beach“.

I also like to use names which ahve to do with sand and/or other famous sand spit features. The name “Cape Cod” might be good, as that cape is one large sand spit feature. I also like to use the name “Martha’sYard” for a Palossand.  There is not enough room to write out Martha’s Vinyard due to the 12 character limit. The island is noted for being the home of the “Kennedy Compound” which housed the famous Kennedy clan, including the late President John F. Kennedy.

“I once caught a Pokemon on Nantucket …”

Another ghostly suggestion is “Chapaquidick“.   Yes, I know that the island is really spelled Chappaquiddick but I am limited by the 12-character length. Most people associate the name with the car accident caused by the late Senator Edward “Ted” Kennedy, in which a young woman — Mary Jo Kopechne — was killed. Of course the young lady did not die when the car drove off the bridge. She survived the crash, but did not drown either. She was trapped under the car in the back compartment, and ran out of air. Kennedy left the scene, and did not report the accident until the next day — thus he was directly responsible for the young woman’s death. He was only concerned with his career, not for the state of the young woman he just had an affair with, and then left to die.

How any American could ever vote for Ted Kennedy after that is beyond my Poké-understanding. Look kids, President John F. Kennedy was a hero. However, the late Senator Ted Kennedy was a … well … you fill in the blanks …

“The Delegate from Chappaquiddick” original artwork appeared in the National Lampoon.

You could name your sandy ghost “Mary Jo” in reference to the poor young woman who was left alone to die by Senator Kennedy.

Do you have a sandy ghost or gaping hole story? Please comment!


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